The Complex Diet of a Vegetarian/Vegan

 The Complex Diet of a Vegetarian/Vegan

***I decided to focus on the facts given and base the title off of that. In the passage, you talk about all this info and it should be reflected in the title. And do not forget to capitalize every word in the title.; Are you a real or fake vegetarian/vegan?

When it comes to a vegan or vegetarian diet, many choose two different ways of eating, either the plant diet index(PDI), the healthful plant-based diet(hPDI), or the unhealthy plant-based diet(uPDI). 

In Ambika Satija's case, a postdoctoral fellow at Harvard T. H. Chan School of Public Health, she created an experiment of people who have a PDI or an hPDI.
***It would be beneficial to the passage if you include Satija's merit. Whenever it comes to research and scientific based work, it is very important to acknowledge a person's merit. It allows people to decide if the person is credible or not.; In Ambika Satija's case, she created an experiment of people who have a PDI or an hPDI.

From the data compiled from both diets, hPDI had a reduced risk of heart disease and attacks compared to PDI and uPDI.
***I added words in the beginning to make a smoother transition. I removed the parenthesis from the sentence as they are not needed.; From the data of both diets,(hPDI) had a reduced risk of heart disease and attacks compared to (PDI) and (uPDI).

People who ate the hPDI diet digested more foods like whole grains, nuts, fruits, and vegetables, but less of sugar foods, potatoes, animal fat, and meat.
***I tried to make the sentence more sensible. It was all most confusing to read and seemed like the writer forgot to add some words. I gave the sentence a solid introduction that properly leads into the main point.;hPDI ate more foods like whole grains, nuts, fruits, and vegetables, but less of sugar foods, potatoes, animal fat, and meat.

People shouldn't call themselves vegetarians or vegans when they eat junk foods like sugary beverages, french fries, and fake fried chicken.
***I added an apostrophe in "cant" because contractions require one. There is not too much wrong with this sentence. However, I highly recommend not sounding so "judgy" when writing. So, I fixed in a way. But I recommend you consider a revision if the sentence of omitting it from the passage.; People cant call themselves vegetarians or vegans when those people eat junk foods like sugary beverages, french fries, and fake fried chicken.

Thus, individuals must choose wisely of what is eaten and drunken to sustain a healthy vegetarian/vegan diet.
***In this situation, I don't think it's important to use "you" in the sentence. Especially, when you never acknowledged the "you" prior to the closing sentence besides the title. I revised it to make it sound less targeted and more general.
; Thus, you must choose wisely of what you eat and drink to sustain a healthy vegetarian/vegan diet.

Source:http://www.popsci.com/vegetarian-vegan-not-always-healthy
Edited by Michael Morrow

The Complex Diet of a Vegetarian/Vegan

When it comes to a vegan or vegetarian diet, many choose two different ways of eating, either the plant diet index(PDI), the healthful plant-based diet(hPDI), or the unhealthy plant-based diet(uPDI). In Ambika Satija's case, a postdoctoral fellow at Harvard T. H. Chan School of Public Health, she created an experiment of people who have a PDI or an hPDI. From the data compiled from both diets, hPDI had a reduced risk of heart disease and attacks compared to PDI and uPDI. People who ate the hPDI diet digested more foods like whole grains, nuts, fruits, and vegetables, but less of sugar foods, potatoes, animal fat, and meat. People shouldn't call themselves vegetarians or vegans when they eat junk foods like sugary beverages, french fries, and fake fried chicken. Thus, individuals must choose wisely of what is eaten and drunken to sustain a healthy vegetarian/vegan diet.

Source:http://www.popsci.com/vegetarian-vegan-not-always-healthy

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